Contributing to the World's Lexicon

It's not all fun and baby-making here in fitzlosophy land- from time to time I will still endeavor to solve the world's problems. Case in point, there are many situations that arise for which we have no words. Below, I shall describe some and attempt to name them:

1. Shletz- When you are in the shower, and you realize you have left something, like the soap or shampoo, or other necessary shower-object on your kitchen counter (like you just bought some from the store), and you have to make that mad, drippy, possibly stark naked dash across your house, in a shletz.

2. Porf- When you and another person are on a phone call, and the call drops, and both of you call eachother back at the same time, resulting in a buzy signal or going straight to their message. You both then wait 10 seconds to for the other person to give up, and then both call back again at the same time, with similar results. You have both porfed, twice.

3. Funt- (This one's kinda gross, but we've all been there) You are on the toilet and realize the toilet paper roll is out, but there is a fresh one in the cabinet across the room. You await an alotted time to account for...ahem...drippage, and then complete the awkward lunge (the actual funt) to grab the tissue while trying to leave your rear in vicinity of toilet.

4. Pintle- When you are singing along to a song, usually with great conviction, and you totally sing the wrong part, or come in early, and lamely trail off into silence. You pintled. All over yourself.

So that's all I have for now. I'm glad to add somthing to the world's lexicon, which has given me so much.


Thesamus said...

Posim: a particular kind of car (like that Tempo I had in Cleveland) that most of us have owned at one time or another is a Posim, short for Piece Of Shit In Motion.

The Phool said...

This is my favorite blog entry so far - I speaks to my Phlogish sensibilities.

Claire said...

One you will get to know within the next year or so...

Goopies: The drizzle of milk that somehow makes it's way down a chin to get trapped in the rolls of fat on a baby's neck, to then coagulate. And no matter how hard you try to keep up with it, goopies happen.