This Year's Pumpkin....UPDATE!

So here's our entry to this years pumpkin carving contest in our building. You can't really see from the pic, but there's a live goldfish in there! I'll post an update later to let you know how we did in the contest. Click on pics for bigger version.

Here's our biggest competition, in my opinion:

Now, I grant you, the Kiss pumpkin looks awesome, but really, they just painted it. So I feel we have the creativity vote. It's funny, we talked about doing the pacman thing too. Glad we didn't- would have been just a bit awkward!
UPDATE!: We won second! Which meant a pretty large basket o'treats. Stupid Gene Simmons got first. Boo. I think if we would have painted ours, we'd have it in the bag, but oh well. I get to eat a huge basket of candy, and I don't even have to trick-0r-treat for it! :)


I love....

-Being married to a true friend. The kind who knows you have no books for the train the next day so he goes out and gets you a new one he thinks you'll like. I wake up every day next to this person and wonder how we found eachother in such a big world.

- New York Pizza.

-Finding new things in a monologue I have done for over 12 years.

-Pumpkin carving contests. We plan on winning the GRAND PRIZE this year in our building. Mwa ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!

-Friends that are passionate about their beliefs, whatever they may be. Unless, of course, they are passionate in their belief in killing me, or taking my aforementioned pizzas. Then, not as much.

-The taste of water from the bathroom tap when you get up in the middle of the night and clear that gross sleep taste out of your mouth.

-My sister. And the fact that we can spend a whole week together doing everything or nothing and still have a kick-ass time.

-Cheesy scarey movies all halloween week long. 'Jeepers Creepers', anyone?

-Paying off debt.

-Dogs in costume.

-Babies in costume.

-Sour Patch Kids, by the pair. One at a time are never as good. Jelly Bellies, on the other hand, are meant to be eaten one precious bean at a time.

-Obama, before he becomes president and screws it all up.

-Slipper Socks.

-The year to come.

That is all. Well, not all the things I love, but all the things forefront in my mind right now. Bitches.


Life Update: Abridged Version

1. Joy Marie, my sister and one of my BFFs, is coming for a whole week starting next Tuesday!! We are going to the Disneyland, thanks the a sweet deal from a sweeter friend, and I can't wait. I just want to sit back, and drink the kool-aid, and learn to love the mouse for a day. And then look in disbelief at my empty wallet.

2. I did an audition for Oregon Shakespeare (again, my Holy Land) today. Even though they are only looking at people for 2010, there was a line around the block this morning. That's how awesome they are. I felt it went very well, so keep those fingers crossed that 2010, I will get one of my fondest wishes!! or at least a call back....

3. Gavin re-quit smoking and has been on the waggon for four weeks!! Let's hope he does all right when Joy the Chimney is in town.....

4. Emmy has an arch rivalry with Momma, the mix breed next door. They mutually attack the gate that separates them and make all sorts of terrifying noise at one another. Well today, the gate was unlatched, and when they went at it, it swung open. They looked at each other in mute disbelief, and then ran into their respective houses. Cowardy custards.

That's all, other than why the F is it warm here today??? What happened to my fall? It was going so well!!


Spitters and Preachers and Everyone In Between

When you ride the subway every day, especially in a city as chock full of weirdos as Los Angeles, you are bound to take a walk on the wild side every now and then. Homeless guys that sing country music, the people that feel the need to talk to someone, ANYONE the whole ride long, the random people dancing quietly to some internal rhythm the rest of us are not privy to- all of these are a daily occurrence. But I had one day last week where the planets aligned in just such a way as to bequeath me with every nut case on the LA train system at the same time, in the same car.

Weirdo Number One- Preacher:
Woman dressed in traditional Indian garb who is vacillating between speaking in tongues and preaching in broken English the Word Of God to everyone on the train in her frantic and hoarse voice.

Weirdo Number Two- Spitter:
African American woman who is making the "hocking a lugie" noise every 45 seconds (not exaggerating) and spitting what she brings up between her feet onto the floor of the train.

Weirdo Number Three- Spitter's Lover:
Spitter's Lesbian Lover who was sitting next to Spitter, and whom I mistook for an anonymous train goer and made a sympathetic face at which was mistook for something else entirely.

After I looked at Spitter's Lover, I noticed her say something to Spitter, who was radiating that "ness" of a person who really wanted to have words with someone over something, like she was just looking for a fight. I don't know if Spitter's Lover was talking about me, but luckily someone got up just at that moment and I got a seat out of Spitter's eye line.

A few uneventful moments passed when all of a sudden, over the din of Preacher Ladies preaching, I hear Spitter say "What the fuck are you looking at. You with the headphones!". Now, I was wearing headphones, so I quailed a bit, but came to realise she was in fact talking to :

Weirdo Number Four-Creepy Guy:
Caucasian Creepy eye contact smiley guy. To be fair, this guy did not come off as a total weirdo at first. We had actually commiserated over the noise of Spitter and Preacher before I sat down- but he came to reveal himself as in fact being a Weirdo later. But I digress.

Creepy Guy: "Why? What's your f**kin problem?"

Spitter: "You my problem. Who the f**k you think you is?".

Creepy Guy: "I think you're a f**kin weirdo!"

Spitter: "You the weirdo!"

Preacher: "Shonda da BOMBA!! You should be ashamed! Shonda da BOMBA!!!!"

Who knows how long this delightful diatribe would have continued but for Spitter and S. Lover's stop having been reached at that exact moment? In any case, Spitter and the Missus left with nary a blow exchanged, and I was mostly just glad I never got directly involved. I do so hate confrontation with the crazy. I stood up because my stop was next, only to over hear Creepy being congratulated by all on the train for standing up to Spitter. He got to talking with YET ANOTHER Creepy guy, and they ended up comparing where they'd been recently incarcerated:

Original Creepy Guy:
"So where'd they send you?"

New Creepy Guy:
"Up to Mondo(?), which I don't know why cause it was only a misdemeanor!"

Orig. Creepy:
"Probably you had a 288"

New Creepy:
"What's that?"

Orig Creepy:
"Violent Sex Offense."

Whereupon I exited the train and began making plans to buy a new car in January. Cheers.