At the risk of jinxing it, a miracle has happened. And that miracle is my baby has decided for the first time in about 3 months to sleep for more than 2 hours, consecutively. Seriously, folks, at one point this kid woke up every hour on the hour ALL. NIGHT. LONG. I don't know if you've ever been truly sleep deprived, my friends, but add to it the grieving process, and woah Nellie, that's some crappy headspace.
Most of her sleep issues began at about 3 1/2 months, when, not coincidentally, we were in New York while my dad was sick, and bouncing from house to house. So no duh, kids are sensitive creatures and all that drama and change manifested in a need for her to be comforted by me 10 times a night. I didn't begrudge her that- but I needed/need sleep to like, function. So yeah, this is a good- no, AMAZING- development that is the culmination of a lot of work on Gav's and my part, as well as being finally settled in one place.
Last night, I slept six straight hours. It was so uncannily wonderful I literally woke with a SMILE on my face for the 4:30 feeding.
Also, I love our little Brooklyn house. Love it love it love it. It's a temporary thing (my family will sell it eventually) but while it's mine I love every quirky nook and cranny. I even love the HIDEOUS gray and pink tiled bathroom with the fucia and green metallic wallpaper. (Seriously, I must post a pic this week for you.) I put up Christmas lights outside and a big tree and hung all our photos and it really feels like home after living out of a suitcase for 3 months.
This will be a hard holiday season for me- there's no getting past that fact. But with a little sleep under my belt, and this small oasis of normalcy we are living in, I know my little family will find some joy in it as well.